Chances are I would NOT feel inclined to date someone in jail/prison ( and I would think most of the female population would agree with me. By most, I am not including the woman currently entertaining the Menendez brothers).
Due to current conditions, meaning their are no real possible options, should we resort to the boys behind the bars? I mean, they need love too, right? I am writing this based on a conversation I had with a friend a few weeks ago. So, without any further ado, here is how it went down. No cocktails were involved either. Just a few sober people discussing men and prison. What's next? A discussion about soap on a rope? We'll leave that for next time.
My friend is in the midst of a divorce. The logistics of the paperwork have not been fully completed but matters of the heart had left this couple way before a paper clip was even attached to what inevitably would go into a manila envelope. She has her own career and has started to put the pieces together of this new life. She is also ready to start dating again. So when she asked me where I go to meet men I told her my guess is as good as hers.
As you get older your options start to dwindle. A bar is no longer the place to meet someone of quality ( even though I'm sure some people do). Quality is the key but where would you even begin to look?
It got me thinking. The older we get the more baggage people need to check. And I am NOT talking about children because I don't consider them baggage. What's a deal breaker? A guy with a wrap sheet so long it makes Lindsay Lohan look like a nun? But at this age should we just expect it? And not only that but most people are not even honest about all the crimes they may have committed.
Here comes the most ridiculous conclusion that we both came up with. Cutting out the middle man and going straight to the prison. I mean you would be able to pick your crime of choice. Sex offenders are off limits. No bargaining there but what about a nice drug dealer? Or a pimp? Maybe a white collar crime? Tax evasion? My favorite? The arsonist. Everyone likes a nice campfire. You do realize we were just kidding?! It did give us a good laugh though.
On the serious side I am a full-on optimist and believe you can find someone without having to go the county jail. Plus, I am a terrible baker and with Hostess out of business I would never be able to hide the razor blade in a funfetti cake. With that creme center you would need a Twinkie to discreetly hide that kind of paraphernalia.
As for my friend, she will find that nice guy minus the horizontal stripes or orange jumpsuit.
Me? I might take a class on cake making.
